Well I've had enough of you ask me to finish the story that I brought my sorry behind back to let you all know what happened after life brutally laughed in my face. If you last recall, I'm standing in the middle of the United Nations, after 3 days of hell, to find out that there was a BIG OL lunch break scheduled from 1pm-3pm. It was currently 1:03pm and 3pm also happened to be the time I needed to head out to catch my flight. So a full flight, Airbnb, stress and panic for....no reason. YUP!
If you have no idea what I'm talking out, and haven't checked out the first part to this three-part series, click here to get caught up!
So, all I can do is laugh. I look at my friend and bust out laughing. She's visibly irritated, but how can you not laugh at the irony? There's no way I can make this life of mine up. I mean, it's real, it's happening. So being my optimistic self I repeat my mantra to myself, "everything happens for a reason". Now, whenever I say this mantra, I try to come up with reasons that the Universe, God, and any and all other energies came to the conclusion that this needed to happen.
Me to myself: Well...maybe if you would've attended a conference you would've died
Myself to me: No....these other people didn't die sooooo.....
Me to myself: Right, right, well...maybe there was no one here of value to you
Myself to me: Really? Do you know where you are right now? It's the UN! What're you even saying?
Me to Myself: Right, right, well...it wasn't meant for you. Can we live with that?
Myself to me: *eye roll* fine. We'll live.
So I decided I would live with it, it wasn't meant for me, and that was ok...I GUESS. As my friend and I walked out of the building, I took one last look at what was once my dream...it wasn't that great anyways. Y'all know I'm lying, it was everything and so much more, but I digress.
We get on the bus back towards our luggage drop-off location to pick up our bags. My friend is nervous about riding the metro without getting lost, but I reassure her that she'll be fine. I show her how to utilize Google Maps and send her on her way. Her confidence in me made me believe I was some kind of pro, and off to the airport I went!
Let me back up a little here and give you all some context. When I first arrived in New York, I flew into Newark. To get from Newark to NYC, you can buy a cheap train ticket to NYC, and if you're really trying to save money, you can buy a round-trip train ticket. So y'all k now what I did right? I bought that damn round-trip ticket! Problem is, as I'm standing at this luggage-drop-off location, I'm thinking to myself: How the hell do I get back to that train?
I did what any sane person would do, I asked the store owner (to no avail), random people on the street (to no avail), and finally I asked Google. Somehow I ended up at Grand Central. It didn't look familiar, but I followed some signs that had trains on them. When I finally showed an attendant my round-trip ticket, I was informed that none of the trains at Grand Central took you to Newark. SHOCK.
I freaked out a bit, calmed down, and found a bus that departed every 15 minutes to Newark for $20. I'm blown, but it's cool, I was still on track to catch my flight.
PRO TIP: When travelling, make sure to always include buffer time in your departure!
I waited 15 minutes...no bus....20 minutes....no bus....30 minutes....you guessed it! NO BUS! I didn't know what to do, but during the time I was waiting for the bus, I finally discovered that my train to Newark leaves from Penn Station! I run to catch a metro to Penn Station (only to find out I don't have enough money on my MetroCard). I'm now forced to put money on a MetroCard I'm fairly certain I'll never use again because F*** NEW YORK!
I make it to Penn Station, and it is a literal zoo. No, no, a zoo is too contained. This shit was a damn Safari, you know, where the animals run wild, and you can literally get eaten by a lion? Yeah. This was a SAFARI. So I'm looking around in amazement, admiring all the animals, hoping none of them bite me. I quickly snap out of it and hit a dash to the train station. It wasn't actually a dash, but more of a push-get pushed back-push more forcefully through-type of situation. The reason for the crazy amount of people: y'all remember that crazy blizzard that cancelled the conference? Well guess what? It also cancelled all the trains. So all the people who missed their trains yesterday were now at Penn Station trying to find a way home. Just my luck.
My rolling suitcase was doing pretty well, I couldn't complain. She stuck by me through it all. I can't say that was the case for everyone at Penn that day. When I finally reach the train booth, I show the man my round-trip ticket and he tells me that I'm in the right place HALLELUJAH! This is the first sign of good news since I'd arrived in that God-forsaken city. He told me that my train was leaving in 2 minutes, and the next train to Newark Airport wouldn't be back until 9pm. Mind you my flight leaves at 8pm, I HAVE to make this train. Remember...there is a Safari, and now I have to run through the giraffes, monkeys, lions, tigers, and bears (shoutout Jazmine Sullivan) to catch my train.
When I tell y'all that I literally picked up little blue (my rolling suitcase) and stormed through the damn Safari. Have any of you ever seen the move 300 where the main character yells "THIS IS SPARTA!!!"
Yup! That's pretty much me, running through the Safari, carrying little blue over my head, waves of people pushing against me. I run up to the train literally sweating from my adventure. It feel like I've just ran a marathon, given birth, taken over the world, your pick. Point is, I've made it on the train! I'm gonna make it to my flight! Right? I sit down, sweating, panting, and ask the lady next to me, "Hey, this train goes to Newark Airport right?". She stares into my defeated eyes, looks at my furrowed brow, my sweat stains and says, "I'm sorry, I don't think so." I wanted to cry.
Do I ever make it home? Do I kill this lady? Do I give up my life and become homeless? Find out next time on....DragonBa.....no, that's not it. Find out next time on...THE WANDERLUSTWAD CHRONICLES!
Let me know if you want to hear the rest in the comments below!